1 year ago
89 There's a character named Lorenzo St. John.
I've never seen The Vampire Diaries, and I know very little about the show, so I decided to rank the first twenty characters listed on IMDb based only on their names and faces – because why not? I like doing dumb things!
The CW / Via giphy.com
My friend, who has chosen to go by the nom de plume Melena Dilbert, helped me out.
1. Elena Gilbert
The CW
Elena Gilbert sounds like a fake American name, and she's very pretty, obviously, but the name "Elena Gilbert" is too obviously written from someone's mind for me to get past.
2. Tom Avery
The CW
Two names, one for each shirt. But it's all boring. Actually, it's three shirts!!!
3. Sheriff Liz Forbes
The CW
There isn't much to say about someone named "Liz Forbes." Congrats on having a name, I guess.
4. Katherine Pierce
The CW
"Is her shirt red because she's a more violent version of Elena Gilbert?"–Melena Dilbert.
5. Caroline Forbes
The CW
This name and picture are trying so hard to have money and to have that be the character's thing – look at the hair.
6. Bonnie Bennett
The CW
I like her vibe, and I like the name, but there's nothing to laugh at here, and therefore I like Bonnie Bennett less than the following characters.
7. Jenna Sommers
The CW
The spelling of Sommers makes me uncomfortable, and she's wearing a necklace from Limited Too.
8. Matt Donovan
The CW / Via vampirediaries.fandom.com
I like the name Matt Donovan and he's the actor from a bunch of things but I don't know who he is.
9. Rebekah Mikaelson
The CW
I won't remember anything about the name or the photo.
10. Amara
The CW / Via vampirediaries.fandom.com
While it makes sense that a character named Amara would wear lipstick that kind of matches her top, "I don't believe that she's actually living in a purely black void." –Melena Dilbert.
11. Jeremy Gilbert
The CW
Jeremy Gilbert is a funny name. "They just looked at a bunch of headshots and found the guy that looked like a Jeremy Gilbert." –Melena Dilbert.
12. Silas
The CW
He's cute but he looks like a teddy bear that's Pinnochio-ed. Also, Silas is a dumb name to have with no last name.
14. Klaus Mikaelson
The CW
A necklace under the shirt screams "Klaus Mikaelson" to me. "I wish I had that confidence in high school." –Melena Dilbert.
15. Ethan Maxwell
The CW
"He dresses like this because he's the heir to the Maxwell house coffee fortune." –Melena Dilbert.
16. Ambrose
The CW
This face isn't an Ambrose at all, it's more of a...
17. Stefan Salvatore
The CW
"Stefan Salvatore" is a bonkers name for a human person. "The name of a person who's trying to convince you they're human." –Melena Dilbert.
18. Damon Salvatore
The CW
I would take a gander that his hair is not washed in this photo, which, to be fair, is consistent with the name Damon Salvatore.
19. Lorenzo "Enzo" St. John
The CW
"Will his Uncle Vinny ever be proud of him." –Melena Dilbert.
20. Alaric Saltzman
The CW
It's Warner from Legally Blonde! Playing a guy named Alaric Saltzman! I rest my case.
Don’t miss Sam Claflin in the new rom com Book of Love from BuzzFeed Studios, coming to Amazon Prime Video February 4th and Sky Cinema February 12th.
BuzzFeed Studios / Amazon Prime Video
TV and Movies
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